Light to see, and to perceive, by;
Space to choose, and act (or not), in;
Zest to feel, or season, with.
These are not the easiest of times. The Dude has had a rather bad cold that has turned into a very nasty cough that doesn’t combine with his hayfever very well. Little Person has been to another one of those assessments, which has left me feeling like I was dragged under a steamroller and then thrown into a compost heap full of thorns and squishy earthworms. And the roof. Ah, the roof. While not literally falling in over our heads, we have workmen fixing a problem they discovered when trying to replace the gutters. Trying is a very apt word.
And yet light, space, zest.
For all the difficulty of Little Person’s assessment, it was enlightening. My qualifications mean I could really appreciate the way the assessment was put together, and understand what they were highlighting. Very well designed test. A chance to see that for all my self-doubt, I was right to seek advice and help. Not just to see Little Person – for we see her every day, but perceive the extent of her differences. Not just to see the roof (again, it looked a little run down, but new gutters would fix that), but perceive the issues underneath.
For all the inconvenience of the roof troubles, we have space to act. Or not act. Choose to deal with the issue, uncover the problem, fix it with much banging and expense, but fix it once and for all. Or not, and hope the whole roof doesn’t cave in on us. Or at least, not soon. When we can see, we can decide how to act. We can choose what to do. And the choice makes all the difference. Sometimes, its just the ability to make the small choices, the knowledge that I can do this one thing, or not do it, that can make a difference.
And zest. The stopping to smell the roses. The little bit of something that you put with a meal that makes it taste beautiful. We can have all the knowledge (the perception), and all the action (the space) in the world, but if we don’t have the emotion, the feeling to go with it … well, what’s the point really? (That’s why, depression sucks, just by the way – it’s not the feeling “down” per se, but the not feeling at all that sucks your lifeblood away.) So for all that it’s been a trying time, I have the greatest zest of all filling my life. As I do my best to feed The Dude nutritious foods, and make space in Little Person’s world for her to be herself, I feel that greatest zest of all.
Only, we don’t call it zest in our home. We call it love.
This post was inspired by the beginning of Psalm 27 in The Message, which says “ Light, space, zest – that’s God! So with him on my side I’m fearless, afraid of no one and nothing.”